football for nerds, and nerds for football

1. Kevin Kelley of Pulaski Academy High explains his team's no-kick approach to football. The short story: it's all about the numbers, and the numbers say keep possession.

2. In an excerpt from his book Eating the Dinosaur, Chuck Klosterman explains why he loves football more at 37 than he ever did at 17. The short story: it's all about the game's radical/conservative duality.

Who says nerds can't love / rule sports?

the cruelest blackout

In my swine flu funk, I'm sitting on the sofa, watching ESPN360, as USC (the other USC) takes on Ole Miss. During commercial, the site jumps over to ESPN radio, displaying a list of upcoming games and TV blackout maps.

This one cracked me up:



For the upcoming, certain-to-be-a-barnstormer contest between Idaho's Vandals and the Northern Illinois Huskies, ESPN360 has blacked out the roughly eight counties that might care about the game. (And not one is in Idaho.)

Nice work, ESPN.

Seattle sports and the end of a (really bad) dream

2008 is almost behind us, and with it, the worst year in Seattle sports history.

You know a city is having a bad year when its biggest fan is forced to draw inspiration from the possibility of watching Jose Vidro, Willie Bloomquist and Richie Sexson play the last-place Washington Nationals.

The thing is, though, Seattle's sports year isn't even that bad yet as Big Lo lies in the hospital with summer approaching. The Mariners aren't even halfway to becoming the first team to lose 100 games with a payroll of more than $100 million, nor have they fired their first manager of the season, let alone their second. The Washington Huskies have yet to suffer a single one of their historic 12 losses or fire their coach or get called for delay of game on their first play from scrimmage. (Delay of game on your first offensive play of a game -- how is that possible? What, did Kenny G play the national anthem?) The preseason magazines hitting the newsstands are picking the Seahawks to win the NFC West for the fifth straight year, not lose 11 games (and counting) on the way to saying goodbye to their coach, Mike Holmgren. And most importantly, the SuperSonics trial over their lease has yet to begin, so there still is hope they will remain in Seattle rather than move to Oklahoma @$&%ing City.

So it's probably best Big Lo finds himself in the hospital in June before the year really gets bad for Seattle, before the year repeatedly reduces him to tears and before he starts routinely asking, "Did we do something wrong?"

I can't say I've shed any tears--or punched any walls, for that matter--but I've learned to appreciate the works of Marcus Aurelius.

ill and tolerating it

1. The post-NBCT letdown, immune-system-wise, has brought a mild cold, my first of the year. Last night I tossed and turned, waking at 2:00 with persistent nasal drip and unable to sleep seemingly because I couldn't remember the author of À la recherche du temps perdu As a result, I spent an hour mentally listing every Frenchman I could remember. Descartes? Clouzot? Camus? Sartre? Montesquieu? Depardieu?) Eventually I hit on Marcel Marceau, which triggered Marcel Proust, and I was able to doze off again.

2. Schadenfreude.

3. Today's football regret: I'm not able to watch the CHS Cougars tackle East Valley. However, I'm going to polish my Mystery Science Theater skills, applying them to the so-bad-it's-gonna-be-great "Crapple Cup," which I predict will go to the Huskies. Later, thee Texas Tech / Oklahoma matchup promises to be excellent. Red Raiders by a TD. Update: Wow. The Huskies lose in double because of a bad kicking day; the Red Raiders get absolutely stomped on the national stage. Didn't see that comin'.

4. Since I so rarely engage in political advocacy, the potential attempt to classify bloggers as lobbyists didn't get too much attention from me. Maybe it should've. Campaign finance reform is about to enter the 21st century, and it's going to be messy. Thanks, McCain-Feingold, and all of your litigal children.

can USC score 100 points against the Cougs?

They're playing Washington State this afternoon, a week after the Cougars ceded 63 to Oregon State. (Wazzu has given up 233 points in 4 Pac-10 matches!) I'd say the Trojans' chance of passing the century mark is around 50%.

Anyone wanna bet a can of Cougar Gold cheese on a miraculous upset?

Update: 69-0, the first shutout in 280-odd games for Washington State, and perhaps a fitting way to end the streak: in abject and utter humiliation.

lowest of the low

The lowest possible tally in a football game that doesn't end in a tie, and both teams score, is 3-2. Doesn't happen often. But it does happen:

Wes Byrum kicked a 36-yard field goal in the second quarter and that was all No. 9 Auburn needed to defeat Mississippi State 3-2 on Saturday night.

The Tigers (3-0, 1-0 Southeastern Conference) committed three turnovers, missed two field goals and handed the Bulldogs their only points with a safety.

But Auburn allowed only 116 yards to Mississippi State (1-2, 0-1).

Wonder if anyone in the stadium asked for a refund.

Apple Cup prediction

Today marks one hundred years of Cascade Curtain rivalry. At 4:00, the Washington State University Cougars meet the University of Washington Huskies, at Husky Stadium, promising a healthy slice of nostalgia baked to a crisp.

Last Wednesday, a current Cougar student teacher asked me who I felt would win it. "UW," I said. "Locker's healthy, and WSU got stomped by Oregon State at home. Doesn't bode well for Cougs."

A glare cold as a Palouse blizzard. "Wrong answer, Anderson."

"Hey, I'm neutral," I said. (I somehow resisted saying "I don't have a dog in this fight.")

The glare iced over. "Even worse."

The Apple Cup: a century of bringing us together even as it tears us apart.

Huskies 31, Cougars 17.

Don't bet on sports.

Update: Don't bet on sports. Cougars 42, Huskies 35 in a wild one.

third time's a charm

For Arkansas, it took a pass on 4th-and-10 in the first overtime to keep the drive alive. But once they scored, you got the sense that deja vu was making a return appearance, as LSU failed on its two-point conversion in the third overtime, and the unranked Razorbacks knocked off #1. Second three-overtime loss of the year for the Tigers.

This is the year of upsets. This is the most exciting year in college football's last decade, by far.

(Texas A&M is looking to send home Texas, too. Not a bad football afternoon.)

there is only shared culture

Low culture? High culture? Bah.


Brought to you by the Cal marching band. (Filmed, sadly, from the less fortunate side of the field--but you can still figure out what's going on. I love the ending, too, as Mario brings down the flag.)

[Via the AV Club.]

more upsets in an ulcerating season

Not Ohio State, which silenced Michigan. Not LSU, which wore down Mississippi. Not Kansas, which trounced Iowa State.

This week's collapses belong to Oklahoma and Oregon. (The latter, to be fair, came at the loss of a potential Heisman-winning QB, Dennis Dixon.) Added: I missed the fact that Oklahoma's loss came via a downed quarterback as well. Ouch.


Time to predict the BCS champion: Kansas. Why not.

Don't bet on sports.

some call it rugby

Not your standard college football conclusion.



[via Joe Carter]

non-upset special

Bro-in-law Jon, reeling from a Cleveland loss to the Red Sox, can at least take comfort in a Buckeye win over upset-hungry Michigan State.

best upsets of the day

Kentucky is good. No one's shocked that they beat LSU--but what a way to do it.

OSU relishes the spoiler role. This year's broken dream belongs to former #2 Cal. Upset factoid:

But the Bears were unable to handle their own business, becoming the 10th team ranked in the Top 10 to lose to an unranked team already this season.

I'll add videos as they become available.

a wild one in Pittsburgh

Saw this one last night while grading papers. I just had to stick around through both overtimes--I've never seen two teams with such horrific defenses battle it out. And Wannstedt calling a pass play on 4th-and-goal with McCoy, his best player, not even touch the ball? That's gutsy. Stupid gutsy.

Back to work.

stomach this upset: USC falls to Stanford

Stanford?

Beating USC?

At the Rose Bowl?

Thou shalt not wager on sports.



2:50 left, down by three, on the Florida 7 yard line, 4th and 1, and LSU goes for it.

They get it. And win.

Thou shalt not wager on sports.

this week's upset blogging

Update 9/30: And now for the even bigger upset that wasn't: The Dawgs couldn't quite take down #1 USC. That woulda been the day's biggest.


Tulane was tough in the first half, but faded in the second, letting LSU slip away:


At the day's end, I'll add the best upset that's as shocking as an upset that's really shocking. (Ah, Simile School. I am a lifelong student.)

And here it is: Kansas State shocks Texas: with special teams!

those were the upsets that weren't

Nebraska survived a rowdy Ball State squad, and Florida squeezed by Mississippi State.

If you're on the main page, click the title to see the video.

upsets of the weekend: Alabama and Washington

The upset that was: John Parker Wilson led Bama into the Promised Land. (If you're on the main page, click the post title to see the videos.)




The upset that wasn't: freshman Jake Locker led the Huskies out of the Promised Land.

UW versus OSU: the college football game of the week

The Times calls it 21-17, Ohio State. Seattle Sports Report calls it 20-17, Washington.

Obviously, the game will end in a tie.

And because of National Board orientation at PLU, I have to miss most of it.

Grr.

Pac-10 standing tall

I've said that the Pac-10 is, right now, the conference to beat. With help from an online Cal fan, Bud Withers says that it's been this way for a while:

Using raw data from the Web site cfbdatawarehouse.com, he crunched numbers from 2000 to 2006, tracking how the six BCS conference teams and Notre Dame did in nonconference games against BCS-league opponents (on the basis of league alignment at the time of the game), including bowl games.

Notre Dame was the winner, going 41-30. But — surprise — the Pac-10 had the best record of the six BCS leagues, at 66-60, followed by the SEC's 68-65. The other four leagues had sub-.500 records.

True, it's only one small measure of competence, and not necessarily the ultimate test. A win against Duke gets you one point, just as a victory against Ohio State does. And it's questionable whether the statistic is any more relevant than performance in bowl games, where, for instance, the Pac-10 went 3-3 last season compared to the Big East's 5-0.

Still, consider it a little more kindling in the crackling debate that Miles stirred over the summer, when he said of USC, "They're going to play real knock-down, drag-outs with UCLA, Washington, Cal-Berkeley, Stanford — some real juggernauts — and end up in the title game."

With UW facing Ohio State and USC heading to Nebraska, this could be the biggest chance for the Pac-10 to prove to East Coasters that it, not the SEC, is the NCAA's premiere conference.