Super Bowl ads among the worst ever

No, Nick Gillespie, it wasn't just you. As Seth Stevenson's rundown shows, this year's ads were some of the most banal, pathetic, or just plain dumb ever foisted on a willing public. Even one of the best ads, the Coke "Love" spot, was played to death in the multiplex before hitting the small screen.

This year we got cardiac beatings, men stripping over a crappy Chevy, chest-hair-pulling, rock-throwing, combover beards, and Mapasaurus. We also got the Web 2.0 / YouTubesque Doritos ad that threatens the entire advertising hierarchy. Sadly, it as good as anything Madison Avenue put up. The only thing we didn't get, thank God, were those stupid rock-em-sock-em robots.

On the plus side, we got Robert Goulet.

Update: Not only that, but their overall crappiness is scientific fact.

The most ineffective ad was from Honda, which showed participants were less engaged during the ad than they were when they looked at a blank screen.

Even ads for Budweiser beer, traditionally known for good-humored advertising, generated negative emotions, fMRI scans showed.

Their target group was 18-34 in age. My freshfolks, I should point out, generally found the Super Bowl ads hilarious, especially the Budweiser rock-paper-scissors spot. Maybe twentysomethings aren't as Will Ferrellish as advertisers like to think.

Sidebar: The Coke Side of Morality

1. Karma ("you give a little love and it all comes back to you")
2. Beowulfian immortality ("you're gonna be remembered for the things that you say and do")
3. Fizz ("La la la la la la la")