say hey, he's no Willie Mays

Manny Ramirez is probably the most entertaining left fielder in baseball. Not only can he pound the ball--473 career dingers--but he can't play defense to save his or anyone else's life. He's the only outfielder I've ever seen kick-slide a blooper and end up booting it out of reach of the center fielder.

So, after tonight's basket catch in the first (eat those five runs, Dice-K), I thought this Onion article was particularly appropriate:

The Red Sox have tentatively agreed to allow Ramirez to telecommute, claiming that although their offense may suffer without him at the ballpark, their defense in a vacant left field may substantially improve.

The M's may not beat Boston, but with Manny Ramirez, every game's a treat.

Update 6:25: Julio Mateo nurses a 7-7 tie in a wild one. (Dice-K has left the building.) After being tagged out in a double play, Big Papi gives Jose Lopez a friendly embrace.

Real men hug.

Update 7:30 We lose a game we had every chance to win. Boo-urns to Horacio Ramirez, who blew a 5-0 lead, and props to Manny, who smacked the game-winner, his second homer of the night. Two closer to Mays.