[From Matthew 12:46-50, Recently Revised Version]
Jesus taught the multitude as his family waited outside, growing impatient as the minutes dragged on. Someone finally spoke up. "Hey Jesus," she said, "your mom and brothers are outside. They left a message and are wondering why you haven't called."
"Mom and brothers? Who are they?" Jesus replied. The joke was met with blank stares, so he tried a different tack. "There are my mom and brothers," he said, gesturing at his disciples, who were loitering in the corner of the room near the snacks. "Especially Peter. If he's not bugging me to clean my room, he's hogging the Wii and stealing my potato chips."
There was a small ripple of laughter. Peter shot Jesus a dirty look, and then, egged on by the other disciples, rushed the stage and tackled him, trying to pin his arm behind his back. Jesus wriggled free and tossed Peter into the audience, which crowdsurfed him out the door. Jesus shouted platitudes over the confusion.
Peter collapsed in the dust outside. "We'll see who gets the last laugh," he muttered, brushing himself off and spying Mary, James and Jude. Peter called over to them. "He pretended not to know you. He said something about his real mother and brothers being the people who do God's will."
"Oh, did he?" Mary said. "Well, no lasagna for dinner, then." She grabbed James and Jude by the elbow and the three marched away.
[139th in a series]