JIM ANDERSON
CORRUGATED TIMES-DISPATCH
BOSTON -- Wiping grease and ketchup from his lips, Ronald McDonald took a break from plowing through the entire Dollar Menu to warn America's youth that his signature fast food is endangering their health.
"Stay away from the fatty, cheesy crap," McDonald said, nicking three French fries from his neighbor's tray. "Have you seen what it'll do to your arteries, never mind your mojo?"
Asked to clarify, McDonald added, "Hey, I don't need to explain. I saw that Morgan Spurlock film. Disgusting." He tore open two salt packets and poured them over his double cheeseburger.
McDonald's eatery, an up-and-comer in the American restaurant scene, has recently taken heat for its high-calorie menu, and has responded by offering salads and bottled water as alternatives.
"It's all about better choices," McDonald said, licking extra ketchup off his hamburger wrapper. "Hot damn, this stuff is tasty. But bad for you."
McDonald washed down his meal with a thirty-two ounce Coke and eyed his neighbor's tray again.
"You gonna finish that?" he asked, not waiting for an answer.
No comments:
Post a Comment