fact-checking for fun and prophets

Note to would-be prophets: if you're going to make prophecies, don't post them in a place where they can be easily dismissed after they don't come true.

Take, for example, the 2001 prophecy page. Go ahead. Read 'em, and see how pathetically vague or utterly wrong they are.

I'd suggest reading the updates posted September 2, 2001, nine days before a truly earth-shaking event. No, not the never-to-occur eruption of Mount Rainier:

The Father yesterday spoke to me about speaking forth this word about his judgement coming quickly upon the earth. I have had several words from the Holy Spirit on what is about to transpire on the earth in the coming days since the beginning of this year. This is the first time the Father has told me send it forth to the people, with a specific warning to those in the Mt. Rainier area of Washington.

The Father is about to unleash a series of events upon the earth that will set men's heart failing. These volcanoes and earthquakes will be set in motion by the Father for the purpose of bringing men's heart to repentance in this hour, and bringing many to Christ. For those who will not heed, they will mean destruction and devastation in the days to come. For truly God's judgement is coming upon the earth in these days that are coming very quickly.

A year and a half ago, the Father showed me a string of volcanoes that would erupt at the same time on the earth. Then about 6 months ago or more, He spoke to me about Mt. Rainier, specifically. He confirmed it through another prophet friend of mine, Jim. Well this past week, He told me it is about to happen, between the next 30-60 days. Pray for what is coming upon the earth, was what the spirit spoke to me.

(Secondary note: when prophesizing, don't link to a website that can't tell the difference between a volcanic eruption and a landslide as "proof" of your about-to-go-unfulfilled "prophecy.")

You'd think at least one of the prophets would've seen 9/11 coming, but no. The closest one mentions a "coming storm" and something incomprehensible about The Taliban and "Burning Man," but nothing about twin towers, Al Qaeda, New York, Iraq, Osama Bin Laden, George Bush, or John Kerry.

After the cataclysm, things were looking bleak for the month of November:

Steve, as I have expressed earlier I feel November 1-5 and also November 11 are key strategic dates to keep in prayer. I see a definite ploy of the enemy to come in and render us defenseless, vulnerable and to catch us off guard. I believe they are planning some things that will surprise us and render us incapacitated.

One of the areas I believe we need to cover in prayer is our satellite and communication systems, both in and outside the United States. I continue to see suitcase bombs being deposited throughout the United States. Some of these are literal bombs as well as biochemical. My prayer sense is to pray that these are neutralized, exposed and rendered harmless.

The other thing I am seeing is our Military. In one vision I see a nuclear submarine. This particular submarine is in a strategic location. I see this submarine intercept the plan of the enemy. It is a chance meeting. I see the enemy trying to take the submarine out before they can submerge and communicate to headquarters.

Yeah, and Tom Clancy is divinely inspired.

Looking "ahead" to 2002, what do we get?

2002 will be known as the year of salvation, saith the Lord. The gospel will be preached to the whole world. Salvation will come to Africa, to Russia, to China, and to the third world countries. You will hear of crusades where as many as 1,000,000 are saved in a single service.

I remember when that happened.

Time and again they're wrong, and time and again they continue prophesying as if they have a direct line to the Holy Spirit. Sic 'em, Jeremiah:

"Therefore," declares the LORD, "I am against the prophets who steal from one another words supposedly from me. Yes," declares the LORD, "I am against the prophets who wag their own tongues and yet declare, 'The LORD declares.' Indeed, I am against those who prophesy false dreams," declares the LORD. "They tell them and lead my people astray with their reckless lies, yet I did not send or appoint them. They do not benefit these people in the least," declares the LORD.