the vortex made me do it

After more than a week away from the computer, I'm back, and have tales wonderful to tell. First, and most important, my brother's wedding ceremony was simply gorgeous, and I was proud to stand with him as he exchanged vows with a beautiful young woman. Charity, welcome to the family.

Second, the fluff. The gravy. The "added bonus." The highlights and lowlights, in no particular order....

1. I am tired. Our flight from Phoenix (or, as a gate agent tried to spell it, "Phonex") departed an hour and a half late, and then the wife and I sat in traffic with Mom-in-law for an hour as four lanes of I-5 condensed to one just north of Federal Way. We made it back to Olympia at 2:30 this morning, but couldn't sleep past nine. If this posting lacks coherence, blame sleep deprivation.

2. Only in the Southwest: In-N-Out and Superpumper. Grub and gas, respectively.

3. At the wedding reception, my parents danced in public, the first time I have witnessed such a miracle. In fact, the family (and I include some longstanding friends in that number) joined in a circle and did some sort of hokey-pokeyish jig to a rock'n'roll number. We were all sober.

4. On Thursday, the day of our return to cooler climes, we planned to trek out to Tortilla Flat for prickly pear ice cream, which Mom had been talking up all week. Stuck in traffic, we ducked off the freeway and drove through remote areas of Phoenix, passing by, I kid you not, "Vinchell," a former Winchell's Donut Shop that was under new management. When we got back onto the freeway, rush hour congestion forced us to turn around and head to the airport, mission unaccomplished. Then we discovered that our flight was delayed, and collective head-smacking ensued.

5. On the last day of school, the main office secretary, hearing that I would visit the Grand Canyon, adjured me to stay for the sunset. The family spent most of Tuesday stopping at various viewpoints around the canyon and hiking down a bit on the Bright Angel trail. We then detoured to Cameron for "Navajo tacos" at the Cameron Trading Post, where our waitress laughed as we all ordered too much to eat. An hour later, the Dodge Caravan galloped back to the park, just in time for a sunset made all the more spectacular by a low-lying forest fire haze.

6. Speaking of fires, Wednesday's trip to the Sunset Crater brought us within a thousand yards of a brush fire, purely by accident. Oddly, the "99 Things to Do in Northern Arizona" guide, on page 6, states:

So here we are in a northern Arizona summer that, for the first time in several years, carries no threat of closures or restriction due to drought or fire danger.

In retrospect: not exactly.

7. CAVE DWELLINGS ARE NOT TOILETS. Seen on the most depressing sign in Arizona.

8. When you tire of rock-paper-scissors, remember this: foot defeats fish, fish defeats skunk, and skunk defeats foot.

There's more--I haven't even gotten to the Vortex yet--but remember, I'm tired. Later.